By: Abdul Rosyidi
Many people of my generation, who were born in the 80s, still vividly remember the sadistic images of the torture of hell. Unfortunately, in the comic, humans who commit sins will be punished with terrible torture. Some had their tongues cut off, some had their heads poured over with boiling lead water, some had their rectums pierced until they reached their mouths, some were torn to pieces by wild animals, and so on.
The comic succeeded in making us scared, having trouble sleeping, and often having nightmares. If it was alleged that the comic was made to convey religious preaching, then congrats, you have managed to frighten and traumatize us. The same fear was experienced by the generation before me, the 70’s generation, and the generations after, the 90’s generation, maybe even the generations after. Congratulations, once again, your victims have been plentiful.
The comic ‘Siksa Neraka’ (roughly: Hell Torture) was the best-selling publishing product in Indonesia in the mid-1980s. These comics are produced by many publishing houses, even those that are produced on a home scale. You can imagine how many hundreds of millions of children in Indonesia at that time got a picture of how terrible hell was, how sadistic the torture was, or maybe you thought how evil whoever made those torture and hell was. How many ‘sins’ that continue to flow from the comic, the creators, and of course the people who benefit from it.
There is a narrative that the Torture of Hell comics are aimed at preaching Islam, more precisely so that people who have sinned repent immediately. The problem is, the majority of readers are young children who don’t know anything. I am one of those who used to read those scary comics as a child. Comics on torture of hell are sold by mobile toy dealers, along with Tatang S.’s comic books, which mostly tell stories about Petruk and Gareng.
It’s also impossible for comic publishing entrepreneurs to know that the users of their products are young children who are just learning the Qur’an at the prayer room. So the reason for preaching is sometimes I think far-fetched. Especially if the goal is for the reader to quickly repent. Where there is a small child who is still cute and innocent was told to repent. Isn’t it said that small children have no sin?
Publishers must have known that selling fear and horror is the easiest way to gain rupiah. Especially if the target is children. The fear of small children becomes a commodity for them to collect profits.
When they made money, I and millions of Indonesian children at that time were still afraid and traumatized. I myself just realized the trauma last year. The highlight of this year was that I struggled with the trauma and learned to let it go from my body, mind and soul. I started to let go of those traumas little by little. But I don’t know, other children are still struggling with trauma and are now probably in their 30s, have families, have children, and pass these traumas on to their children.
I hope that anyone who has been traumatized like me because of these hellish torture comics can immediately unravel and let go of their fear of something we will never know the truth of. And don’t pass on trauma to the next generation.
The process of unraveling that I did myself cannot be separated from knowing the truths about myself step by step, the secrets of creation, what is life after death, what is the punishment of the grave, heaven and hell.
The story in the Torture of Hell comics, I, also only learned a few years ago came from a yellow book called ‘Uqudul Lujain. Maybe it’s also in other books, but the narration in the comic is really very similar to the sentences in the book ‘Uqud.
In a Umah Ramah lecture, Buya Husein Muhammad explained that the narrations were sourced from hadiths whose validity could not be accounted for. The hadiths that explain the torture of hell in the book are completely hadiths that are not connected to the Prophet. What’s more, according to him, women are often the targets of torture narratives. Now, there is not the slightest reason for me to still be afraid.
Self-blaming
Instilling fears in someone is a very effective way to discipline and control. This practice is usually carried out by state apparatus so that citizens do not protest. This method was once practiced by the New Order regime in various ways, mainly by imprisonment, silencing, kidnapping, and even murder. The Petrus incident (mysterious shooting) – among many other actions – is one of the regime’s ways to instill fear in its citizens.
In society, it is not only the state that spreads fear, but all the authorities. This includes religious authorities, customs, and so on. All of those authorities instill ideas of torture, pain, and suffering into a person for a certain amount of time until they think and feel it.
When the idea is internalized and attached to a person’s mind, soul and body, the person will discipline themself without the need for law enforcement officers. This is the most efficient and effective means of control in the history of mankind. The self becomes a “panopticon” (overseer of all directions) for oneself who does not stop watching for 24 hours, who disciplines the smallest mistake in one’s heart.
In imprisonment, panopticon is a circular prison with cells arranged around a central well, from which prisoners could at all times be observed. Inside oneself, the most effective panopticon is the idea of fear and torture.
It is this disciplinary technology that often creates deep trauma for individuals, prompting self-blame, feelings of guilt, tainted, self-harm and even suicide. Umah Ramah friends and I found similar trauma from almost everyone who experienced sexual violence.
They are often stigmatized as perpetrators of adultery. Although at the time of the incident, they did not give their consent, still within the framework of religious law, they had sexual relations outside of marriage. In a sense, no matter how much they are a victim, they are still a perpetrator of adultery.
These stigmas strengthen the “controller” within, who has been instilled to blame oneself from the beginning. The result of this disciplinary action was to gain support from outside and further corner the individual in the panopticon. They also lose confidence in themself and if left unchecked it will lead to the act of ending their life.
Back to the comic ‘Siksa Neraka’ (roughly, Hell Torture), the punishment for those who have extramarital relations, get pregnant out of wedlock, have cohabiting, free sex, ‘deviant’ sexual behavior, is very brutal. The stories were echoed so often that for a long time the person closed their inner eyes to know themself. This is where even the most important aspects of the body, sexuality and embodiment, become even more difficult to understand. Even though the body is the closest ‘friend’ and continues to accompany the days, it remains unknown. Instead of trying to understand oneself, sexuality is always associated with fears of sin and the torments of hell.
Besides through comics, the idea of self-discipline by embodying fear is also carried out in many ways. Through religious lectures & speeches, and social media contents. You can imagine how many millions of Indonesian people live as a nation and religion under fear and threats. The sad thing is, if this is true, all this time we have only pretended to be good people. We project this image because we are afraid of retribution, afraid of hell. The funny thing is, these ideas reach our hearts and minds because of the actions of the apparatus of power.
A sense of freedom
Many individuals who came to Umah Ramah shared their experiences and trauma. Although initially they came to tell about the incidents of sexual violence they experienced, we also learned that their trauma was many, layered and multifold. And the heaviest of all is the trauma of the fear of sadistic torture. Almost all of us experienced the same trauma.
Departing from the subjective experience of each activist, we at Umah Ramah encourage them to start breaking down and releasing the shackles of panopticon. Because the trauma has been living in the mind, soul and body for a long time, the process of decomposing it also requires many approaches. Primarily, all processes of decomposition originate in the process of discovering the truth within oneself.
In order to unravel, we need to develop a sense of freedom. This feeling of freedom is not what many people imagine about ‘Western-style’ freedom. This feeling of freedom, according to Ki Ageng Suryomentaram, is called a feeling that is not contradictory between the senses, conscience and mind.
Freedom originates in the union between “seeing” external phenomena and “understanding” all the internal faculties within oneself. This feeling will arise if a person is honest with themself and does not use various attachments to express themself.
For example, a person who has a sense of freedom will use nothing but the self (what the self is) to live. Many people do not have a sense of freedom and use various kinds of ideas, wealth, intelligence, position, lineage, character, and so on, as a way of life. As long as it is dishonest to be yourself, that sense of freedom will not exist, and as long as that sense of freedom has not been found, then the traumas from the disciplinary process will never be unraveled.
For us at Umah Ramah, the process of breaking free from trauma is a collective process that all of us need to do, by those who experience it, by each of us individually and collectively, to find ourselves.***
This article was translated by Napol Riel.